Are you happy in your relationship?

Back when I was “the addiction guy,” I didn’t get into relationships too much.

But I’ve realised that when they’re not right, everything else suffers:

- Your mindset.
- Your productivity.
- Your peace of mind.

If you’re either:

a) In a relationship that doesn’t “feel” 100% right, or
b) Stuck on a past relationship you can’t let go of…

It’ll impact everything.

You’ll find yourself overthinking, self-sabotaging, and losing focus—because your mental bandwidth is constantly drained.

So, what’s the answer?

Well, not ignoring it first of all. It ain't gonna fix itself.

Relationships are like a garden: nurture them, they flourish. If you don’t, they die.

And sometimes, the nourishment needed isn’t just more love and attention.
It’s structure. A way to really tackle the issues.

Enter The Container.

This is something I've been coaching clients on in sessions this week.

A container is a set period of time where you and your partner commit to focusing on one issue. You set boundaries, agree on rules, and face the problem head-on.

Let’s say there are unresolved trust issues. Here’s what a container might look like:

- 6-month timeframe
- 30-minute weekly conversation—no distractions
- We attack the problem, not the person
- Both work with a therapist during this time
- Bi-weekly progress check-ins
- 3-month review: What’s next? Stay together, or go separate ways?

The takeaway? Relationships are work. Simple as that.
You can still have fun, but you can’t skip the hard conversations.

Love is beautiful, but it can be messy, too. Containers help keep the mess in alignment.

What do you think about using containers to tackle relationship challenges? Have you tried anything similar?